I’m going to take a moment to vent, complain, and let everything out before I collect myself and move on with my life…

I’ve been depressed again the past few days. Because the bug bomb caused health problems –> stay in bed for 4 days and counting –> no work –> NO RUNNING (ughhh!!) –> just bed + food –> WEIGHT GAIN –> bored and depressed.  I hate being sick. And I hate gaining weight as a cherry on top. I have no money so it’s not like I can go buy books to read or movies to entertain myself with… even tho the book Mockingjay (3rd installment of the Hunger Games) came out today which I’ve been dying to read for months… I need money but wont be returning to work until 1.5 weeks later. I’m going back to school but as of right now, I feel like i’ve got nothing going for me. I dont have best friends anymore. It’s my fault, I know. But it still sucks. I dont have an education to hold on to, money, my ideal weight, nothing to hold on to. that’s why I’m so freaking depressed. As soon as I feel better tho, I’ll be back to running, working, and studying for school. I cant wait to get better again. I’m desperately hoping to feel better within 2 weeks cuz it’s really stripping me of everything I had going for me. 

I’m gona at least TRY to make the most of this down time though. Art journal, go for a walk, check out library books, south beach diet, etc. Something to keep myself together.

I just feel like breaking down right now, but I know I’ll get thru this. I’ll be back in shape in no time. October will be my month, where my health recovers, where I start running again, where I’m on south beach diet again, and I’ll be okay. 

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