Num

I feel so numb lately. All I feel like doing is eat and then I feel depressed that Im puting on so much wieght so then I eat some more. I quit my job because I couldnt take the stress or uniform anymore. Now I just want to start to get my life in order, maybe start seeing a professional for help and to focus on losing the wieght ive put on. In order to do that my mind keeps telling me to purge but I know better and have not given in. I was also thinking of starting to get back into swimming since i live near a rec centre but Im scared to make that first step going by myself. I always feel so embarassed doing stuff alone but to anxiety/panic attack prone if I try to do something in public with someone. Id rather suffer the self esteem lost. – i wonder how good of a workout swimming would be, how long youd have to do it each day and how quick it would work?
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